|—||Jesus (John 17:3 NASB)|
"How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death.”
“I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you will know what is the hope of His calling…” Eph. 1:18
It’s what’s controlling me, destroying
And cajoling me, its ploys are ruthless,
Worthless, truthless, and it seems I can’t be free.
Inconsistency is ultimately… me.
But will it end? Self-deception,
Non-correction, voluntary servitude
To feelings, whims and pleasures that
In turn make me a slave to… Not You.
Doubts and fears, opposition,
Isolation led to this position
Of complacency, and has me asking,
What is wrong with me?
The fact is, life is hard,
And faith is hard,
And hope is hard.
I can’t see You, hear You, feel You,
Touch You, but I want to be touched
BY you. Could it be true,
That You are who You say You are?
My scars, they mar my view into
The unknown, say it can’t be true
That someone like You would do
What You did… For me.
But Jesus loves me, this I know
Though my heart’s sometimes slow to accept
And it’s kept my whole self at a lethargic pace, which
In this great race, will not place me to face my reward -
To heal is surrender, to rise is His power,
To mend in His eyes is uniting all that
Which is good - the intellect, it intersects
The heart of faith, interconnecting parts
That NEED each other.
That I need is the confession -
I can’t see my life’s direction
‘Cause I stagnate underneath the weight of sin
And duty, inundated in complacency
Unless You indicate to me the timeless,
Present hope of boundless joy, revealed to me,
Revealed IN me by the indwelling Source of Love.
|—||Dom Marmion, Benedictine monk|
Is God a means to your desired end? Or is HE your end, your beginning, your desire, your provision, your joy?
In other words, is God God, or are you? Do you worship Him, or your own desires?
A very important question to continually ask yourself.
"Lord, you are my portion and my cup of blessing; you hold my future." -Psalm 16:5
"The Lord is my shepherd, there is nothing I lack." -Psalm 23:1
I can’t even believe how torn up I am inside about jumping on the bandwagon and trading my compact little cell phone with a nice slide out QWERTY keyboard for a big smartphone that I don’t need. Bah! I think I died a little when I had to get it. My parents say I must be old-fashioned. Maybe I’m mindful of wastefulness. Or maybe I hate change, or just the lack of creativity with new phones—they all look the same! And they all give constant access to Internet and addictive applications!
But I suppose I should be thankful because I did need a new phone and my parents are paying most of it and it’s a good deal with our family plan.
But still… I wasn’t prepared to say goodbye to my beloved phone of 4 years… RIP little green phone with awesome slide out keyboard and pressure sensing screen that I could use even with gloves on…